Non-Verbal Communication

Even more confusing and sometimes more embarrassing than the verbal aspect of communication is the non-verbal aspect. There are many types of non-verbal communication that have varying effects on interactions.

Touch. The United States is a relatively non-contact country, whereas in Venezuela, for example, touch is common and expected. Miscommunication might occur when a Venezuelan tries to touch an American at a time that is not perceived to be appropriate by the American. The amount of physical contact between two people depends on the nature of their relationship. In a casual friendship, there might be a small amount of touching, like a friendly pat on the back. Close friends of the opposite or same gender will often hug each other without any implication of a physical (sexual) relationship. A couple that is dating may touch frequently in public, although explicit public displays of affection are generally frowned upon. Women do not generally hold hands with each other (as they do in some countries) in public, and two men will very rarely touch each other aside from a pat on the back or friendly punch on the arm.

Personal Space.  This aspect of communication is easily violated when someone invades another's personal space by standing or sitting too close. For example, an Iranian has a much smaller personal space than an American. This becomes obvious as they talk--often the American will back up uncomfortably to compensate for the perceived invasion of personal space, while the Iranian will move closer for the opposite reason.

Time.  Different cultures perceive time differently; they are on different "cultural clocks." Some cultures treat time loosely while others are more precise. When an American says he will meet you at 7:00 p.m., he means 7:00, not 6:55 or 7:05. On the other hand, when a Bolivian says 7:00 he may arrive at 7:15 or 7:45, and not feel that he is late. This varies, of course, according to setting, such as a party or a class meeting. In general, Americans value time and "doing something" rather than "wasting" time. Being on time is very important in many situations, especially if you have an appointment to meet with someone (like a doctor, professor, or your advisor). If you are late, the person with whom you had the appointment may not be able to see you and will require that you re-schedule.

Body Language.  One of the most misunderstood factors of communication is kinesics. This includes gestures, facial expressions, body position and movement. Kinesics are entirely learned within a cultural setting. For instance, posture is used to include and exclude people in conversations. Approximately 55% of our meanings (emotions) are revealed through facial expressions. Kinesics are complicated and vary greatly from one cultural group to another. Observing interactions between other people is a good way to learn about the kinesics of a culture. You can watch people at parties, in restaurants, walking on campus, or in the classroom to see how they interact with friends, colleagues, professors, or strangers.

Eye Contact.  This varies with personality and gender, as well as cultural background. In general, eye contact in the U.S. is used to let the other person know that you are paying attention to what is being said. Looking away from the speaker or "staring off into space" implies that you are not paying attention, and casting your eyes around can give the impression that you are not to be trusted. Conversely, if you are perceived to be staring directly and intently at someone, it may make him or her very uncomfortable.

Summary.  To restate, non-verbal communication is perhaps the most difficult aspect of understanding a new culture and may be one major contribution to problems confronted in the hostility stage of culture shock. Non-verbal communication cannot be learned in the classroom, but must be experienced first hand. As the newcomer, international students need to be aware of these prospective difficulties as they will be perceived to be committing the miscommunication. Although it may be very frustrating to try to understand the new culture, over time your efforts and patience will be rewarded.

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